Third Time's the Charm?

@ B & N Cafe:

I know Roy is operating tonight so I won't be bumping into him. I go to the cafe to work on my writing. A handsome, tall, older man in a crisp cream shirt, cargo pants, coffee, and perfect skin sits next to me. "Mind if I join you?"

Me: No, not at all.
Guy: You must get approached by many men here.
Me: *laughs* yeah right.
Guy: Really? Because you're very attractive.
Me: *smiles* thank you.
Guy: I'm Steve. Steve Daniels. Nice to meet you.

We strike up conversations about our neighborhood, passions, siblings, and travels. Steve has recently come back from a electronically isolated environment in Israel as part of his Jewish culture, although he is not orthodox. He tells me he likes walking here from his apt. roughly 20 blocks away north--which is millionaire's territory so Jo tells me.

Steve: I'm self employed... after a medical condition. I translate documents in 5 different languages for several different companies.

Uh oh. What kind of medical condition? I like the way Steve communicates. He talks in a calm and understanding tone-- mostly listening, quarter sharing, and a quarter asking questions... unlike Roy who could go on forever about his life given a question or two. Roy loves to talk, but soon turns deaf after listening. Even for a doc.

Steve: So... what's your availability like this week?
Me: *curious* Steve, can I ask you a question? *he nods* How old are you?
Steve: I am... 40 something.
Me: Oh...
Steve: How old are you?
Me: I am 20 something.
Steve: You know, age doesn't really matter to me as long as it doesn't matter to you.

He talks about how relationships always end because of something else-- hardly because of age differences. I agree. I think he also indirectly called me agist: dicriminatory of people based on age. I feel somewhat guilty and agree to have lunch with him this weekend.

(Catharine Zeta-Jones and Michael Douglas: my favorite inter-age couple!!)

Age, does it matter? From experience, I feel it doesn't. I've dated 30-year olds who never grew out of frathood and eary 20s who know what they want and go after it. Of course, most guys prefer young arms so age is not much of an issue for them. As for I, I am mainly concerned with a guy's level of maturity and pace in relationships. But if this is the main concern, why are many people still grossed out by large age gaps?

This is the 3rd time a guy has asked me out this month at this cafe! And I was just working on my writing o=). This is definitely beats meeting someone at a bar. Go to your local cafe dealer today! *wink*

Meet the Friends Part I

Friday, I invited Roy for a bike ride at Central Park with friends.

(Sat. afternoon text msg)
Roy: Hey Sony. Did you plan out tomorrow yet... I'm not 100% sure I can do it then :(
Me: Sorry I'm at work right now (again, workaholic). Hey. Actually Ana and I want to meet at 3. It will be cool then.
Me: Will you be free at 3?
... no answer

@ B & N Cafe:I turn around waiting in line for coffee and see a man in a plaid hat that looks strangely like Roy's... His skin is darker like Roy's and he also has a tan messenger bag like his. I recall he usually tells me he's "chilling with his homies" and c'mon, it's a Saturday night. What's he gonna do at a bookstore?

Low and behold, Roy! Alone at a bookstore!
Roy: *smiling* Hello.

I turn around and jump. It could have been disastrous if he heard us talking about him earlier! And Ana, my friend, she was looking around for this Roy-lookalike I was telling her about... while he was walking RIGHT TOWARDS US. They introduce themselves to each other. He jokes about my bad vision. Ana agrees. We ask each other about the night. What are you doing here?

Roy: Oh, my roommate had a lots of people over. I was just taking a nap *looks at his watch*... and trying to get some work done so I came here.

Ana thinks Roy is lying. I hope she's right-- it'd be kinda cute how he tries to impress me. Roy is behaving well tonight, Ana is here. He tells me he'd love to hang out tomorrow. We all review plans for tomorrow's bike ride and bid each other gnight.

Meeting the friends is an important situation that doesn't happen nearly enough. I CAN'T STRESS THIS ENOUGH!

You never truly get to know someone until you see them around other people. When friends are interested in someone, I always encourage them to bring their prospects out for a group outing (pref. a mix of girls and boys). I like seeing ppl in the context of their natural environment. You learn so much more about a man... rather than having him tell you during an artificial constraint of a 2-hour dinner date at a restaurant.


Odd- This is the 5th time we've seen each other during 2 weeks we've known each other! either by chance or date. I keep bumping into him at the Cafe. Perhaps, he's a B&N addict.

Ahh good memories. We met here :)