Weary Eye for the Undomesticated

Roy: After the sunset... we can rent a DVD.
Me: Have you heard of In the Loop? It's showing at the indy film theatre.
Roy: no..... it could be fun, hey can you bake us some cookies or a diff cool desert!

Whaaat? Do I look like a housewife to you?? who will bake after work? I love how he wants it "diff"-icult. Oh, so now it has to be difficult? Why must you want to give me a hard time! And I would be baking YOU cookies; there would be no baking "US" unless you're slaving in the kitchen WITH me. He's not even my boyfriend!

Me: Sweetie by the time I'm finished baking, I won't have time for you.

Sigh*Once you cook for them, they will ask another time.. and another. Don't get me wrong. I LOVE TO COOK and BAKE... but only when I want to. Conclusively, best for me to feign I can't cook.

#80 "I'd like to see you more"

@ Rosa Mexicana:

He orders us Pomegranate margaritas. It is very strong.

Roy talks about his rough childhood (who doesn't have it rough?), how he broke his arm at 5 and no one believed him, how the doctor saved him... and that is how he knew he wanted to be a surgeon. He asks me what's the most difficult event I had to go through. I tell him a little about my sister. Roy would like to meet her. My sister is still family and I only introduce my family to men if I'm serious about them. Interestingly enough, that hasn't happened to anyone yet.

So, Roy claims he's "very innocent" and I am "an evil seductress." Evil??? I challenge his claim.

Me: How am I evil?
Roy: You're not evil... it's just... I'm scared of your intentions for me... like you'll take advantage of me... after this drink! *joke* You're so smooth in your interactions with me.
Me: What kind of innocence are you talking about?
Roy: Oh! So you can use the knowledge against me! *laughs*
Me: No. If you're referring to moral innocence, then it's unfair to think you're the only innocent one. I think we're all pretty innocent.

Wow. Here I was bent out of shape and unsure about my place in Roy's life... while he was doing the same. :)

He tells me about his Buddhist beliefs and meditation in uniting light and energy. Roy is repulsed by Hinduism-- contrary to his Indian background.

Roy: The third step is to unite light. For example, look at what's happening to us right now... We are giving off and receiving energy. I am enjoying it, and I hope you are too. *Pauses* I am getting to know you... and I enjoy it every time I see you. Sony, you're very mature, beyond your years. How old are you again? ... you're smart, witty, fun... You're dorky, but I have a lot of fun every time I see you. I'm not sure if it's your youthfulness- but then again, you're very mature. Can I ask you a small favor?

Me: *smiles* what is it?

Roy: I would like to... get to know you more. I know you have work and all, but... if we could just chill more often and I don't know... rent movies, go out and eat... I'd really like that.

When we leave, I give him a kiss. He tells me several times to "be good." What's that supposed to mean!

#79 Minding Table Manners

Last night @Saigon 48:

Steven, the 26-year old, muscular stock trader with slick black hair whom I met at my cafe, chomped down his pork steak with a fork and striped the meat to its bare bones with his greasy fingers. I was immediately embarrassed and disgusted. You know what else drives me crazy? Guys who end sentences with OK? "I want you to be my girlfriend ok?" "I'm free Saturday, ok?" "My job is fairly flexible ok?" And this was only our 2nd date!

He ate up the pork steak entree in addition to a vegetarian entree that I had ordered. He even ate half of my entree (I couldn't finish it)!! The nerves of this guy to try to touch my hand after finger-licking...*shoulder shudders.* My jaw dropped. In a perfect world, I would have stormed out those doors, but I feigned sickness and requested to go home.

I feel sorry for anyone who has dined or will dine with Steve. Or even be seen with him.

Certainly won't be me. Ugh!


Table manners are important to me. That's the first thing many people notice when I dine with them and I am proud of it. Table manners signify dignity and respect for your company, the staff members, and your food. We are not mindless animals. So don't eat like one!

Losing your Mojo

@ Two Boots Pizza:

Belinda, she is cute 22-year old, poised, generous acct. manager at my firm. She's also my boss, although we have become good friends and lunch buddies.

Belinda: I think I've lost my mojo.

Me: What do you mean?

Belinda: I don't know why. Maybe it's because I got out of a rough long-term relationship... but not to brag or anything, but I used to get asked out by tons of guys! Even when I was with him. Now... no one is asking me out. My friend tells me I've lost my mojo.

Me: Take your time.

Belinda: I asked my guy friend what it is about me and he tells me "'well, it seems that when people approach you, you have a big 'F*CK OFF' sign on your forehead.'"

(grumpy pup but oh so cute!)

Hmm-- what does that even look or sound like to someone??? Are there some people who are naturally intimidating? We should ask ourselves everyday whether we are giving off an eery vibe. Sure, a rough day is only human, but having so many rough days enough to have someone say you generally give off a hostile n' negative vibe? ...It just scares potential lovers n' friends away.

Third Time's the Charm?

@ B & N Cafe:

I know Roy is operating tonight so I won't be bumping into him. I go to the cafe to work on my writing. A handsome, tall, older man in a crisp cream shirt, cargo pants, coffee, and perfect skin sits next to me. "Mind if I join you?"

Me: No, not at all.
Guy: You must get approached by many men here.
Me: *laughs* yeah right.
Guy: Really? Because you're very attractive.
Me: *smiles* thank you.
Guy: I'm Steve. Steve Daniels. Nice to meet you.

We strike up conversations about our neighborhood, passions, siblings, and travels. Steve has recently come back from a electronically isolated environment in Israel as part of his Jewish culture, although he is not orthodox. He tells me he likes walking here from his apt. roughly 20 blocks away north--which is millionaire's territory so Jo tells me.

Steve: I'm self employed... after a medical condition. I translate documents in 5 different languages for several different companies.

Uh oh. What kind of medical condition? I like the way Steve communicates. He talks in a calm and understanding tone-- mostly listening, quarter sharing, and a quarter asking questions... unlike Roy who could go on forever about his life given a question or two. Roy loves to talk, but soon turns deaf after listening. Even for a doc.

Steve: So... what's your availability like this week?
Me: *curious* Steve, can I ask you a question? *he nods* How old are you?
Steve: I am... 40 something.
Me: Oh...
Steve: How old are you?
Me: I am 20 something.
Steve: You know, age doesn't really matter to me as long as it doesn't matter to you.

He talks about how relationships always end because of something else-- hardly because of age differences. I agree. I think he also indirectly called me agist: dicriminatory of people based on age. I feel somewhat guilty and agree to have lunch with him this weekend.

(Catharine Zeta-Jones and Michael Douglas: my favorite inter-age couple!!)

Age, does it matter? From experience, I feel it doesn't. I've dated 30-year olds who never grew out of frathood and eary 20s who know what they want and go after it. Of course, most guys prefer young arms so age is not much of an issue for them. As for I, I am mainly concerned with a guy's level of maturity and pace in relationships. But if this is the main concern, why are many people still grossed out by large age gaps?

This is the 3rd time a guy has asked me out this month at this cafe! And I was just working on my writing o=). This is definitely beats meeting someone at a bar. Go to your local cafe dealer today! *wink*